This is another mars-vs-venus-kind-of-article! So if you don’t believe that men and women are different… firstly you are an idiot or maybe under 10 years old secondly just don’t read you won’t be interested!
I really can’t get around the fact that men just don’t understand women and vice-versa!
My best friend is a boy, my flatmates are boys and a lot of my very good friends are boys (yes, I am clever!) this is to explain that actually I do realize that girls can be rather difficult and given the choice I would much rather recruit guys (not just for their physical attributes, although please visit the new store Abercrombie & Fitch in London, veryyyyyy promising!!!) to work under me, guys are much easier and they usually get along with each others. Yes, there is an element of jealousy and bitchiness in almost every woman; the ones who deny it are the worst! (ok, ok! no! not your mother! this is a sensitive spot for guys…)
But as I was, very inarticulately, trying to get to is that basically, and from my own experience on listening to both sides is that both men and women actually say what they mean! But somehow, the other side always filters it as it is more convenient…
So here are two very simple and classic examples:
GIRLS, when a guy tells you that it is not serious and he is not looking for commitment, THIS IS WHAT HE MEANS! Even if he only says it once and calls the next day because he feels cold in bed again. He’s not telling you that you are simply a good shag because THEY ALL HAVE MOTHERS AND THIS IS THE MINIMUM RESPECT THAT THEY OWE TO EVERY WOMAN!
BOYS, if a girl tells you she’s not having sex before marriage… how can I put this??… SHE IS NOT HAVING SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE! Just find someone who will!
So let’s all just make the world a little bit of a better place and actually believe each others?!
The reason why I am writing all this, and I had thought about it many times before, is that if I ask someone if they would like a cookie, that is exactly what I mean, A COOKIE! Someone will learn the lesson…
Patricia Durao
I can put down dates and times and probably even the weather conditions for when most events took place, even the emotional ones.
I know when everything took place, when i changed at every step of the way, i can actually visualize these moments as if they were happening again right in front of me… sort of an ‘out of body’ experience where i am looking at myself and where I was and what I was feeling.
There is one moment that I don’t know when it took place, I am only sure it did not take place at the time when it would seem more likely, no! It was definitely after that! I am not sure when it was, and I can’t really point exactly what were the causes but, the fact is that I stopped believing! I don’t believe, like I used to, that there is an ultimate reason, that there is happiness and that there is a goal in the end… I am not unhappy, and maybe that is why I stopped believing, I don’t think life can be safer or nicer than it is now… and it’s not extraordinary, it’s not overwhelming, it’s not full of joy or peace and love… it’s just safe!
I never thought that safety is happiness; quite on the contrary I always thought safety was made for fools that need to be taught how to behave on every single circumstance and their existence is based on the most basic of the surviving instincts. I wouldn’t have lived life the way I did if I thought safety and security were happiness, but now… they seem to be the only certainty left in me and, i can only find and trust both within myself, no one else inspires these feelings on me and I don’t think anyone will ever be able to!
I have always believed that in life you are only certain to regret what you haven’t done and I can’t stop myself from feeling that way… I guess I will have to resort to my stubbornness and start believing the old saying ‘better safe than sorry’…
Patricia Durao